Ya Heard?

I probably shouldn’t be on the Internet or anything, but I have to vent somehow. At the beginning of last week my aunt realized my grandma sounded sick. My aunt that lives in a nearby village in Mexico went to see her after my mom and aunt called her to tell her to go and eventually took her to where she lives to take care of her. My grandma got worse and worse and my aunt wouldn’t take her to the capital to the doctor until my mom told her she was flying over there to take her herself. Today, she called me and told me the doctors say she has liver cancer. I felt like I was in a movie. I’ve been crying ever since and keep hoping it’s a nightmare and I’m going to wake up any minute… but I realize it’s not going to happen. I keep thinking of all the things I should have done. Should have. Could have. Would have. But I didn’t. She’s getting worse and worse and I only hope my sister and I make it there in time to see her. I barely talked to her like a week ago in our teasing way and now knowing that she’s not going to be there anymore hurts so much I can’t even explain it. It’s horrible and I can’t even do anything about it. I wish I could just be with her right now or that I could have done something when I went last year.